Mourning the first progressive I ever met

The loss of Rob and Michelle Reiner is a gut punch our community, movement, and democracy.

I’ve been just so sad all week and feel like I lost a family member - someone who has been in my life as long as I can remember and who influenced my politics like few others. Like many people my age, I first “met” Rob Reiner on television.

Like many my age, I grew up watching All in the Family, where Rob Reiner played Michael “Meathead” Stivic—a character who, at the time, felt radically different from almost anyone else I saw on TV. He was unapologetically progressive. He challenged racism, sexism, war, and hypocrisy at the dinner table. He argued with authority. He pushed back. He believed something better was possible.

Looking back, he may have been one of the first openly progressive people I ever recognized in popular culture—not as a caricature, but as someone grounded in values, conviction, and moral clarity.

At the time, I didn’t yet have the language for it. I just knew he felt right.

In the days since Rob Reiner and Michele Singer Reiner were so tragically taken from us, I’ve read many tributes from friends, collaborators, and leaders who knew them in ways I never did—intimately, personally, over decades of shared work and friendship.

What stands out most is how many people they touched—not just through film or public life, but through sustained, behind-the-scenes commitment to democracy, equality, education, and civic participation.

Rob Reiner didn’t just play a progressive on television. He grew into one in real life—again and again, with intention.

Together, Rob and Michele Reiner devoted enormous energy to causes that mattered deeply:

• LGBTQI+ equality, including playing a central role in the legal fight that led to marriage equality

• Children and families, through landmark early childhood investments

• Democracy itself, especially the belief that voters should have direct power to shape policy

Rob Reiner understood something that too few people in politics fully grasp: direct democracy matters.

Few know that when Mike Lux and Will Robinson recruited me to launch the Ballot Initiative Strategy Center (BISC), part of their pitch was they had recruited Rob Reiner as a founding advisory board member, and I knew that with his involvement, we would take off.

It was just after Prop 10 passed, an initiative he played a huge role in qualifying and passing. He believed deeply in the power of ballot initiatives—not as shortcuts around democracy, but as a form of democracy itself. Tools that enable voters to take the lead when legislatures stall. Tools that build movements, not just laws.

That belief showed up consistently throughout his life:

• In leading California’s First 5 initiative, investing in early childhood development

• In fighting Proposition 8 and helping secure marriage equality nationwide

• In defending the First Amendment, civic engagement, and inclusive democracy

What also matters to say—especially now—is that Rob Reiner didn’t just show up for the visible moments.

Rob Reiner was a Democrats Democrat. Yes, he attended conventions. Yes, he spoke at fundraisers. Yes, he used his public profile to support Democratic candidates and causes. But that was never the full measure of his engagement.

Much of his most meaningful work happened behind the scenes.

Like the best directors, Rob understood that lasting impact doesn’t come from being in front of the camera—it comes from shaping the story, building the team, and doing the unglamorous work that makes success possible. He read memos. He sat in long strategy meetings. He helped build organizations. He lent credibility to early ideas before they were proven winners.

He did the hard work.

He invested time in ballot initiatives, legal strategies, institutional building, and long-term campaigns that didn’t always generate headlines—but did generate real, durable change. In that way, his political life mirrored his creative one: thoughtful, disciplined, collaborative, and deeply intentional.

Michele Singer Reiner was not just by his side—she was a leader in her own right. She served as treasurer and founding board member of the American Foundation for Equal Rights and was deeply involved in the strategic, unglamorous work of building institutions that could win lasting change.

They lived their values together.

In a moment when cruelty, misinformation, and dehumanization are often rewarded, I want to remember Rob and Michele Reiner for something else entirely:
for believing in people, trusting voters, and committing their lives to expanding who gets to belong—and who gets to decide.

For many of us, Rob Reiner was the first progressive we ever met.

For millions more, he and Michele helped make progress real.

May their memory be a blessing—and a call to keep building the democracy they believed in. My heart and love go out to all who knew them and were impacted by their work.